How we ended the middle east war...

© Copyright Brian Carter, 1991

It was 1995, the war in the middle east was into its 805th year
There was nothing else to do but introduce the enemy to cricket.
Thus the 904th round of negoriations saw the question asked...
Do you want to play cricket?
Winner goes home
Loser fills in the holes!!

It seems there was nothing left to do
In order to resolve the fighting and end the war.
Their intelligence was good but....
Would they know enough to work out the game of cricket?
There would be a fair chance we could lose them in Gully
Or catch them out in slips.

All were dressed in camoullage greens
And 19 were killed when the umpire tossed the coin....
To decide who was to bat.
We put 16 in the field
When we were sure they were unclear about the rules!
We had there 21 batsmen out by lunch
For 8 goals 6 points and made $480.00
And an arms deal, by lunch the next day.

In the eighth innings, 9 home runs were scored
When we blew up the wicket and the scoreboard.....
After 5 days and the mining of the field
We won by a nose
With a third trailing by the length of the straight...

It was a great moment for the world
When peace was finally brought to the middle east by cricket.
All the world then put in
To send ships to those purged and burned nation
In order to bring home all their holes
To distribute to other places.

The war was completely bowled out
By a sporting rout...
Sport, if all cultures allowed, could end all wars
With the greatest tradition of all...
The handshake and drink at the start and the end of the game!!!!!!